At some point in the last few months, all my friends grew up. (Did that sound like an alternative beginning to 'Peter Pan'? Yeah, I thought so too.) Not really sure how it happened, but while I’ve been figuring things out, they’ve been off buying houses and being adult-like.
In honor of their big moves and changes, I decided to send them an itemized list of things I’ve learned over the years. This was a pretty comical gesture, because no one in their right mind would want home improvement advice from me. Nevertheless, sometimes it takes being on your own to really learn the most obvious of things, and I wanted to share these hard-earned lessons.
I've gathered the most recent additions since moving to Tennessee. They include things such as:
2: They do not sell WD-40 at Target. At least not at mine. Though, I guess this is only a small problem, because I finally found some and am not convinced it works. My ancient, hand-me-down headboard still squeaks every time I so much as walk by, and my closet door still creaks like a prop from a horror movie.
3: It's exciting to hang a painting by yourself for the first time.
4: It's NOT exciting to step back after hanging said painting and realize you have no concept of what’s level, because the picture is now hanging cock-eyed.
5: Just because your friend is crafty and handy and removed stain from her furniture seamlessly does not mean you have the same skill, no matter how hard you try.
6: It may not be a good idea to stain furniture in the house, but to avoid Norbert's (aka the barn swallow who thinks my porch belongs to him) poo and dive-bomb attacks, you may seriously consider making it an indoor chore.
7: You will feel equally proud of yourself for both successfully staining your first piece of furniture and not getting any stain on the new carpet. You will also feel woozy for about a week thanks to the fumes and the poor air circulation in your apartment.
8. Carrying a huge load of freshly laundered sheets and towels and a full glass of red wine while simultaneously talking on the phone spells disaster. Especially if you have a tendency for klutziness.
9. Red wine can come out of brand new carpet, but not easily or completely. Crying doesn’t help.
10. It’s OK to grumble about the dust on your living room fan. It’s also OK to put off cleaning it until your brother comes to visit and plead the case that he’s taller and stronger, therefore it’d be better for everyone involved if he was the one to clean the fan. (Or simply ask him to do something else that involves a ladder and then say, "Oh, while you're up there..." while handing him the duster.)
BONUS: If your dishwasher is on the drying part of the cycle and something suddenly smells like it’s burning, something is probably burning.
You are welcome for these pearls of wisdom. It's pretty safe to say it's good that my friends are the ones buying houses and not me. What are some no-brainer things you've learned or experienced after setting out to live on your own?